February 03, 2023 | Tagged Parenting,
Creating Healthy Parenting Boundaries
Truly, this aspect of parenting is one of the most difficult. Some of your biggest parenting challenges will revolve around boundaries. Boundaries begin with each parent. Crossing boundaries as parents must be addressed before addressing children’s crossed boundaries.
Here is a good worksheet to do alone or with your co-parent:
- What intrinsic goals do I/we have for our son or daughter? (An intrinsic goal is a child who has a great attitude, who has joy for life, dedication to learning, has courage in difficulty, etc.)
- Am I (are we) on track with these goals?
- Is there resistance to these goals from the child?
- What is causing the resistance?
- What tools are used to define boundaries and expectations in the home?
- What is the rate of follow-through with those boundaries?
- What happens when a boundary is crossed?
- Are there differences in how a crossed boundary is handled by me or between the co-parents?
- What is the level of toxicity in the home—bitterness, blame, aggression, apathy, isolation, depression, frustration, lack of trust, and lack of connection?
- What resources am I or the co-parents using to create healthy boundaries?
- How do I (we both) decide if a boundary is too strict or too loose?
- What level of joy and well-being is in the home and in our relationship with my child or my co-parent?
Hey NBC Parents,
Sometimes reading about boundaries can feel overwhelming and it’s easy to want to become super strict if boundaries have not been upheld. The best way to handle this temptation is to ask forgiveness for not following through. This helps increase the positivity in the home. Pick the most important boundaries (we recommend 1. requirement of a grateful attitude 2. quality behavioral follow-through). Commit to disciplining these crossed boundaries every time without anger or passivity. For example, if a student is ungrateful, he or she has a consequence every time they have this ungrateful attitude, and the consequence continues until the attitude is in alignment.
About NBC Volleyball
Since 1979, NBC Volleyball has been committed to helping athletes, coaches, and parents live lives of excellence on and off the court. NBC stands for nothing beats commitment and the belief that daily habits reveal future success. For more information about this transformational program visit www.nbcvolleyball.com