February 07, 2023   |   Tagged Parenting,

Parenting Unselfish Kids and Basketball Players

Unselfish basketball is a joy to watch. How do you raise up kids to be an unselfish player and leader on the court? As a parent, if you value kids who are not selfish or entitled, here is a key principle to consider.

Here is an example of selfish basketball. A player who is the "star" gets sole shooting practice at the basketball hoop during warm-ups, while the other players dutifully wait on the bench until he/she is finished.

A "star" player expresses disgust that her teammate throws a poor pass by refusing to hustle back on defense to show her frustration with her teammate.

Here is an example of selfish behavior in the home. When a son or daughter leaves his or her plate and cutlery at the table expecting someone else to clean up after him or her.

A sibling won't share the possessions that the parents purchased for him with siblings because it is "his" property.

Children who only receive money, time, and the effort of others and are never required to give these in proportion, often become entitled and selfish. Unselfishness is the discipline to be generous with our time, money, and effort to help those around us. A generous heart is a happy heart. Generosity is a key quality of the healthiest on earth. It is truly better to give than to receive. Help your kids live in generosity toward you and toward their siblings. Help your basketball players understand their mission isn't solely self-promotion on the court. They should work to serve their teammates.

1. As a family, have a loving and honest conversation on noticing how much money, time, and effort are given and received.
2. Find fun and creative ways to serve as a family and give together your time, money, and talent.
3. Avoid shame and anger as tools to motivate more unselfishness.
4. Celebrate acts of generosity without comparing.
5. Selfishness in children is often found in a relationship with parents who truly have little to give each other relationally. They are takers in the marriage with each other.
6. Selfishness can be in entitlement. How much money, time, or effort are you or your family lavishing on a person or persons in your family? Find ways to balance the amount of flow with an equal balance of giving. Maybe draw a visual map to help see what is going on.
7. Never promote selfish play from your kids. Can you identify what selfish basketball looks like? Don't excuse this behavior no matter how talented you perceive your student to be or how selfish you perceive the other players to be.

About NBC Basketball
NBC Basketball is a sports educational program committed to the mission of building stronger athletes and better leaders. Parenting is one of the most rewarding and demanding endeavors and is worthy of our highest pursuit. Educating coaches, parents, and students are important to NBC Basketball. For more information about this camp program visit www.nbccamps.com.